5 common concerns about working with abuse
Many people come to me saying, “David, I’m so drawn to what you’ve said about Trauma & Abuse: The Unshaming Way. I feel called to this work. But I’m afraid that…”
And they share very valid reasons why they’re not sure if this is the right program for them to do right now.
So today, I want to walk you through some of the most common concerns I hear to help you decide if Trauma & Abuse: The Unshaming Way is right for you.
#1: “But I had a good childhood.”
Often, abuse can hide in places we aren’t looking. Especially if you have a voice of inner criticism, anxiety/depression, pain or chronic illness, it’s likely that there is some abuse in your past that hasn’t been fully witnessed.
Abuse includes the obvious examples of being physically or sexually violated, or child abuse. But we’re also looking at more subtle and insidious violence, such as…
Being criticized
Being neglected
Being unseen or unheard, made invisible
Being objectified
Being treated like a problem
Being told “something is wrong with you”
Being punished in a way designed to hurt you
Being sent to a therapist for being “abnormal” in some ways
Having others comment on your sense of style
Being a member of society from a marginalized and oppressed group
Even if you did have a great childhood, most people will still experience abuse – from romantic relationships, partners, teachers, peers, or the culture at large. While no one gets through life without experiencing some form of abuse, some people are able to experience abuse without it festering into trauma.
Trauma & Abuse: The Unshaming Way will teach you tools to prevent abuse from taking hold in your psyche, in the past or in the future.
#2: “I don’t know who I am without my abuse story.”
You are still you, but with a much more clear understanding of who YOU actually are and the unique gifts that you are here to share with the world. Within your suffering, you will find the seeds to a more whole Self.
I want you to radically reimagine your story to leave room for beauty to bloom even in the darkest moments of your life.
#3: “How is this different from somatic experiencing/therapy?”
Somatic experiencing focuses on sensory feeling experiences. But feeling without the body free to move is often not enough. It’s important to move and use the voice because trauma leads people to freeze, psychologically and physically.
In Trauma & Abuse: The Unshaming Way, there is a greater focus on the body’s movement and voice, in addition to the feeling experience.
We alchemize abuse and trauma when we freely move, stand up, make gestures, scream, moan, even dance. This is what I call Radical Soma
In Trauma & Abuse: The Unshaming Way, every symptom is not just looked at as an expression of stress or trauma, but as a seed to flower into its own intelligence. This is here for a reason. What can we learn from it? Where can we see the beauty?
In most trauma healing modalities, dissociation is treated as something to get rid of. But when we alchemize our abuse, we look at dissociation as a gift that has kept us safe, and we create the circumstances that allow us to peer through it to find the gold underneath.
#4: “Doesn’t time heal all?”
No. While many people can and do change their relationship with trauma over time, the roots of abuse can take hold deeply within us and continue to impact us for decades.
Abuse lives inside you, in perpetuity. It’s still happening today, right now, and that’s why the trauma continues to bring it up to you. It’s only by witnessing that abuse with love that its impact begins to heal.
The results of abuse and trauma in your life don’t need to feel out of your control. You can come to understand them in a new light – and when you do, you will also gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your own inner wisdom.
#5: “I’m scared of what I’ll find.”
Abuse is a heavy topic that can be hard to discuss. In fact, many of us are taught to avoid talking or even thinking about it.
That’s why being part of a group where we can peel back the layers and look at abuse with a loving, non-judgemental gaze is so powerful. This is a rare space.
In Trauma & Abuse: The Unshaming Way, there are structures in place to support you:
You’ll have the opportunity to talk with David during the live group calls
You’ll have the option to be paired with a loving witness who can help you process through your trauma, as you help them
The coursework itself is designed to be both gentle and impactful in helping you radically transform your story
You’ll be amazed at how supported you will feel by having a loving community around you as you process whatever arises.
If you are currently experiencing deep trauma that impacts your daily life, you may want to also have a therapist or other 1:1 counselor in your life to help you process through that trauma, including what arises in this program.
If you walk away with nothing else from this article, I want you to know this:
Working with trauma and abuse in this way allows you to access your deepest gifts.
Not addressing them may leave you in a place where being abused is normalized. This can also contribute to behaviors around numbing out with food, alcohol, drama, social media, etc.
If you feel called to this course, I invite you to click here now and enroll.
When you enroll in Trauma & Abuse: The Unshaming Way, you’ll get free access to my popular pre-recorded training on Unshaming Inner Criticism (value $43).
